Music is your only friend

I went to a record fair today, which I don't think I've done in about 5 years? And I forgot how fun it is! It gives me a lot of anxiety too, it shouldn't but it does as I feel so out of place, so afraid of my choices being judged. Because the handful of records I've bought the past few years have all been from Amazon or HMV I'd completely forgotten the thrill of the search, and the excitement when you find something you like - I saw a copy of Tom Waits' Bastards which reminded me of going on an adventure to a completely different city for Record Store Day to buy it along with the rest of the Orphans set and Piper At The Gates of Dawn. They had so many great records that it was difficult to narrow my choices down (but I did!) and I recognized how skewed my opinion of how expensive vinyl has gotten is just because of HMV. Record fairs are much the same as they've always been, some sellers pushing their luck of course but that's nothing new. It made me feel really excited about this old hobby again, and if I could get over my stupid anxiety and feelings of inferiority I'll bet I could find a good community out of it. I realize I've been hiding in the anonymity of HMV which isn't the best way, and that's why I've felt so ambivalent towards vinyl and started collecting CDs. I still like CDs and want to collect them - I want to collect everything on CD and reserve vinyl for the albums I really care about - but I was thinking of giving up vinyl completely as I was no longer seeing the appeal of it, and now I wonder if I haven't just been hiding because of the community aspect surrounding vinyl. Vinyl takes me out of my comfort zone in a way that CDs don't, but that's not necessarily a bad thing.

I also want to acknowledge that this anxiety hasn't sprung up out of nowhere, and I've experienced a lot of sexism in these spaces. For being a female in a mostly male orientated hobby, and having men presuming my music taste or that I know less than I do about what I'm buying and trying to lecture me. This was my outfit because I'm tired of toning myself down to be taken seriously. I'm learning not to be afraid of being myself again.

dress + cardigan: secret honey // shoes + bag: angelic pretty // beret: primark